You met her once at an event. Now what?

How do online and in-person presence work together to build a community that knows, trusts and shares your work?

“I’m just not good at networking.”

If you’ve ever said that to yourself in the car before an event, hi. Same.

Here’s my confession: I built a thriving community with terrible networking skills. I’m not the woman gliding around an event, charming every person she meets. I’m the one feeling wildly uncomfortable by the snack table, or chatting with the people I already know.

The truth is, I like running the room; I love serving, and I thrive when I have a purpose. If you want me to mingle with new people I haven’t met, I suddenly stumble over my words and become very aware that I don’t know what to do with my hands.

A little tip for my awkward gals: I now use fidget rings to help calm myself, although I’ve recently learned from a body language course I just completed that isn’t ideal either, but for this stage, I find it helps me. 😅

And despite my discomfort with meeting new people. Three years into running YVR Creatives, I’m surrounded by women who show up when I invite them, share my work, book with me, and recommend me even when I’m not there.

That didn’t happen because I’m a natural. It happened because I figured out that online and in-person presence aren’t two separate jobs. They hand off to each other.

So let’s talk about the moment most of us drop the ball. You meet someone amazing. You swap Instagram handles. You both say “we should totally grab coffee!”

And then… nothing.

They met you once. Now what?

Why isn’t a big audience enough?

Community isn’t another thing to add to your never-ending to-do list. It’s how your business becomes known, trusted and shared.

Visibility helps people discover you. Trust gives them a reason to act. And you don’t need the biggest audience to get there. You need people who believe in what you’re building and want to be part of it.

An audience watches. A community moves with you.

A real community will:
• Show up when you invite them
• Buy, book and attend
• Share your work with other people
• Recommend you when you’re not around to do it yourself
• Create collaborations and opportunities you couldn’t create alone

That’s not a nice-to-have. That’s your competitive advantage.

What does your online presence actually do?

Your online presence is the front door to your community. Before someone attends your event, books your service or walks over to introduce herself, she’s looking you up to figure out who you are and whether she belongs in your world.

You don’t need to share everything. You need to share enough of yourself for people to find a point of connection. When you show up clearly, it gets so much easier for the right woman to think, “Oh. This is for me.”

I started sharing online in 2019 as a form of therapy. Nobody knew who I was. And that’s the part most of us skip: you have to be willing to show up before the community exists.

A few things that helped me:

1. Know your why. What impact do you want to make? Your reason has to be stronger than your fear of being seen.

2. Speak to one woman. Know what she’s struggling with, what she wants and the words she’d actually use.

3. Give her a reason to come back. Educate, encourage, entertain or connect.

4. Share the journey. People love feeling like they discovered something early and got a front-row seat as it grew.

And please, don’t dismiss the people already listening. If 20 women came to hear you speak, you’d never say “only 20 people showed up.” Treat your early followers like founding members.

Don’t forget the social part of social media

Posting content doesn’t automatically build a community. Community starts when people know their presence matters.

In the beginning, I responded to practically everyone. Those little conversations became relationships, and those relationships became the foundation of everything I’ve built.

Content creates visibility. Conversation creates community.

How do you network when you’re terrible at networking?

Welcome to my highly questionable networking strategy. It’s not glamorous, but it works.

Attend the event. Feel wildly uncomfortable, but give people the chance to meet you. Listen more than you talk, because people remember how you made them feel.

Find familiar faces. Use the people you already know as a safe place to land, then let them introduce you to someone new.

Make yourself useful. Take photos, capture video, tag the host, and introduce people who should know each other.

Continue the relationship online. Follow up, send the photo, and engage with her content without asking for anything.

The first time, she’s a stranger. The second time, she’s familiar. Eventually, she’s your community.

You don’t have to work the crowd. You just have to keep coming back.

Why do you need both?

Here’s the hand-off nobody talks about.

In person builds the trust. Online keeps it alive between events. One without the other leaks.

She sees your posts for months, then meets you at an event, and it feels like catching up with a friend. Or she meets you at an event, then watches you show up online week after week, and by the next event she walks straight over to say hi. Either way, she isn’t a stranger anymore.

Relationships grow when people feel remembered. That means you:

• Listen to what matters to her

• Follow up and reference the real conversation

• Offer something useful, like an introduction, an idea or some encouragement

• Stay consistent, because trust is built between launches

You don’t need more followers or a better elevator pitch. You need to keep showing up in both places until people feel like they know you.

So what’s your next move?

Pick one thing from each category this week. Just one.

Online
Post the idea you want to be known for

Leave five thoughtful comments

Pitch one aligned collaboration

In person
Register for one event

Capture something useful for the host

Follow up with one person

Remember that woman you swapped handles with and never followed up with? Send her a message today. Seriously. She’d love to hear from you.

If you’re ready to practise this for real, join us at our next Leaders Lounge; grab your ticket here.

Want to get comfortable showing up online first? Download my free Camera Confidence guide

If you’re ready to create a batch of content to make showing up online easier, I offer VIP Content Filming Sessions. These are your chance to work one-on-one with me. You tell me your big audacious goals, and I’ll help you figure out how to share that on camera. Book a free discovery call here.

About the Author

Christine Coughlin is the founder of YVR Creatives, a community where women entrepreneurs come to be seen, get connected and grow their businesses.

With a background in marketing communications and PR, Christine helps women become the confident face of their brand. Through VIP Content Filming Days, she pairs on-camera coaching with strategy so women walk away with content they’re proud of.

She also brings women together in real life through Leaders Lounge, her monthly networking event, and Creators Society, a private membership for founders who want support, visibility and community in one place. Through The Society Pages, she shares the real stories of women building businesses their own way.

Christine lives in the suburbs of Vancouver with her husband, three kids and one million plant babies. A self-proclaimed personal development junkie, she finds peace and inspiration in nature.